Disclaimer: I own myself.  As for the concept, it belongs to the Animethon artists who call themselves "Skulking Ninja Fanworks".

Author's Notes: I was sorting through my old Animethon booklets and I came across this comic strip.  It originally starred B.A.K.A.'s mascot: Kaia the angel.  For those of you who don't know BAKA stands for Bonzai Anime Klub of Alberta.  Check it out here: http://www.ualberta.ca/~baka/.  I added some other annoyances of fandom in here too.  Anyways, read and enjoy.

A Public Service Announcement

*The words: "Star Otaku in..." flicker on the screen, followed by the title "A Public Service Announcement", which is shown in black and white.*

*The scene changes to show Star Otaku standing in her usual clothes (rectangular glasses, blue button up shirt with elbow length sleeves, cargo khakis, and a pair of ratty of Reeboks for those who don't know) in black and white.  Cheezy fifties education film music is playing in the background.*

Star Otaku:  *waves with her lunch bag in hand* Hello children!  Today, we're going to learn about fanfiction, or "fanfics" for short.

*Star Otaku strolls down along a friendly looking neighbourhood.  She stops in front of a modest house with a picket fence and a few hedges surrounding the sides.*

Star Otaku:  Have you ever wondered what happens to your favourite characters after a fictionial series ends?  Ever think about how a small change in the plot would affect the outcome?  Well, lots of people do!  And many of them write fanfiction about their ideas.  However, all too often they fall prey to the *enter sinister music here: Dun dun dunn~nn* Bad-Idea Demon, then write stories too terrible to consider.

*The cheesy music continues.  And a little demon, complete with little red horns and a pen instead of pitchfork, tip-toes behind Star Otaku and jumps over the fence, then crawls to through the hedges.*

Star Otaku:  There he goes now!  Let's watch him at work, shall we?

*Star Otaku tip-toes and ducks behind a bush.*

*The Bad-Idea Demon is hovering over a confused, and nerdy looking, writer.*

Beginning Writer:  Oh boy, I better start on my first fic.  What to write?  What to write?

Bad-Idea Demon:  *to himself* Hehehe... A likely candidate. *whispers in writer's ear* Hey, buddy, why don't you make a crossover of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Harry Potter, Animorphs, and Dragon Ball Z?

Beginning Writer:  *little light bulb over his head* I know!  I'll make a multiple crossover with DBZ, Buffy, Animorphs, and Harry Potter!

Bad-Idea Demon:  *claps hands in glee* Yes!  You never watched a single episode or read any of the books, but who cares?  Make some stuff up along the way, and who would ever know the difference?  Don't forget, there's no need for disclaimers.  Now make yourself the hero and have all the girls love you!  Then all the guy characters should be jealous of you or they could be your best friends!

*Star Otaku angrily jumps out of the bush and intervenes.*

Star Otaku:  That's a really terrible idea!

Bad-Idea Demon:  She's just jealous of your talent!  Now forget spell-checking.  We both know "awesome" is spelled with a 'u'!  And you know what?  Let's just chuck grammar out the window, too.  I mean, it doesn't matter if some words aren't capitalized and if there aren't any spaces either!

Star Otaku:  "Awesome" is not spelled like that, and spelling and grammar do matter!

Bad-Idea Demon:  *sticks tongue out* Now, put a few parts from your series out... oh, let's say, every two years?  Don't forget to write all manner of naughty scenes just to keep the readers coming back for more!

Star Otaku:  That's just horrible! *waves arms in the air* Don't listen to him, young writer, save yourself!

Bad-Idea Demon:  You experienced writers are so picky!  You should show her!  Put Star Otaku in there and make her really dumb!  In fact, make her the enemy too!  Add a few swear words as adjectives to describe her.

Star Otaku:  *raises lunch bag**angrily* What did you say, you little shrimp?!


*The Bad-Idea Demon is lying unconscious on the ground, he has the anime spirals in his eyes with little birdies and stars circling his head.  Star Otaku looks back up and claps a hand over the frightened young writer's shoulder.*

Beginning Writer:  Thanks Star Otaku!  You saved me from a fate worse than death!

Star Otaku:  *sternly* Don't let this happen to you, kids! *points to the battered demon* Avoid the Bad-Idea Demon and write good fanfiction!

*The music stops as "The End" pops up, and then the credits roll until the film runs out.*

"Ninety percent of fanfiction out there is forgettable.  Nine percent is just utter crap.  And one percent you never forget.  We're in it for the one percent." - Animethon 7 Fanfiction Panel